#gtchat Archive
Global #gtchat Powered by TAGT is a weekly chat on Twitter that takes place on Thursdays at 8 p.m. ET/7 p.m. CT and 5 p.m. PT in the U.S. For one hour, parents, educators, advocates and experts in the field of gifted and talented gather to share resources, links, authentic life experiences and insights about gifted issues.
Tuesday November 1, 2016
Peter here. with a PhD. WAIS subtest scores from 70 to 160. Former GT type kid.
For the next hour I’ll be joining others at ( ) ~ please pardon the heavy stream or better yet; join us!
Welcome to Global Gifted and Talented Chat Powered by the Texas Association for the Gifted & Talented
Also, a long term interest in intellectual precocity and giftedness.
Our topic today is “Successful Parenting Strategies for Gifted Kids”
That is a good topic. I will share what I wish my parents had done.
Thanks for coming out! Let's take a minute to introduce ourselves. Share who you are & where you’re from! https://t.co/giKR6KM7ds
Carol Bainbridge from NW Indiana...mom of gifted young adult, writer/blogger about gifted kids, advocate for verbally gifted kids.
I’m Lisa Conrad ~ advocate, presenter, blogger, Parent Editorial Board & mother of 2 gifted young adults in Pittsburgh
I already intro'ed myself
Hello Melissa from Katy TX teacher & mother of GT students. Also grew up GT & Dyslexic.
But I guess I can plug my book: Screwed up Somehow but not Stupid . It's about but has some stuff
I am a Gifted Specialist from North Carolina. I was raised in multiple countries (a so called Third Culture Kid).
Hi. Gail Post from Gifted Challenges. Psychologist, mom, blogger from outside Phila.
Happy to be chatting GT again with you fine educators.
New to ? We use a Q1) / A1) format for questions & answers. Remember to add the hashtag >>> to each tweet!
New to ? We use a Q1) / A1) format for questions & answers. Remember to add the hashtag >>> to each tweet!
If you use tchat it adds the hashtag automatically
Hello from Dylan in Ottawa, ON!
Before we start ~ best wishes to all our friends attending in Orlando this week!
Question 1 is coming up; let’s chat!
Hi there Lisa! Trust you're well.
A1) Parents need to emphasize that every individual is different by their very nature.
What is Q1)? How can we have answers before questions?
Yikes! It's showing on Twitter, but not on Participate either!
Parents should encourage their children to improve their personal best.
Q1) How can parents help gifted children distinguish between ‘better at’ & ‘better than’ while embracing their ‘differentness’?
A1 Better is a word with little meaning b/c we are all good at different things. Strive to keep growing not… https://t.co/oribyEDswE
Q1) How can parents help gifted children distinguish between ‘better at’ & ‘better than’ while embracing their ‘di… https://t.co/77V6qe8HWZ
A1 List a variety of skills and point out that different people are better at different ones. And on one is great at all of them
A1) Being different is what makes someone unique, not better.
A1) For gifted children, the difference is often the distinction between agemates and peers. (Delisle)
A1 Emphasize that ability/competence does not make you superior to anyone
A1 Also, try to figure out what "better than" could possibly mean; interesting project!
Gifted HSP synesthete. https://t.co/lJWcVwDUQ7 cofounder, serving gifted and ND students through student-centric program
A1 Even if A is a better person than B, B might be better at, say, the piano.
A)1.Parents teaching children where to put there energy (things in their control) is crucial.
A1) Gifted children should understand that ‘intelligence’ is only one part of who they are.
I'm Kelly-veteran elementary teacher, homeschooling mama to 11yr 2e boy-advocate, blogger, writer & educator
A1) Parents can impress upon their child that age becomes less important as they grow older.
is interesting stuff. I'm 2E myself
A1 Try to help child avoid basing self-concept on comparisons to others (easier said than done)
we are working very hard to promote growth mindset and adding "not yet" to our struggles
A1 focusing on what they can control gets their eyes off of others
A1 Parents & Teachers need to reinforce a growth mindset & personal motivation & model goal setting & reflection
A2) Parents are role models. Don’t say anything you don’t want repeated.
Please post questions before answers! Now we have A2 before Q2
A2 "When I was your age." Lol!
A2 You are... the smartest, better than other kids, brilliant, the best, etc.
Peter ... I am. Not sure why they aren't showing in all apps. I'll post again. :(
Q2) What are some things a parent shouldn’t say to a gifted child?
"if you are truly gifted you should be..."
A2 You must be the best, strive for perfection, get the highest grades, do better than the other kids
A2) Be careful how you praise. "You learned so quickly!" --> If I don't learn something quickly, I am not smart
When Gifted Kids Don’t Have All the Answers: How to Meet Their Social & Emotional Needs (Amazon) https://t.co/fxVExwXgl4
Yes! Using the "S" word locks them in, makes them afraid to try. https://t.co/tvwDKusMPM
A2 You are... the smartest, better than other kids, brilliant, the best, etc.
A2 Avoid making the child's worth a function of how gifted they are
You are better than every other kid. Sets them up to fail.
A2) Parents need to strike a balance in knowing the difference between pushing and encouragement.
A2 Avoid the "tyranny of the shoulds"
A2) anything devaluing or judging emotions being felt. No such thing as incorrect emotion. If you feel it, it exists.
A2) Be careful how you praise: "You got an A without even studying!" "I'd better quit studying or they won't think I'm brilliant"
A2 Also, avoid mentioning your love for them in the same phrase as praise for what they did
A2 If you're so smart, then why can't you...?
A2) Avoid praising a child's ability. Praise the work. Praising ability is like praising the color of a child's hair or eyes.
Oy ... this makes me crazy!
I agree. When they see their strengths and set goals they focus on themselves
A2: 'If you're so smart, why can't you (X)?'
For my 2e ... "you're smart - you'll figure out. Well ... not really. Very frustrating.
A2 Why can't you act normal like the other kids sometimes?
A2 You are great at everything. Every child needs FB positive & constructive. They need to know they won't… https://t.co/3xDQdxI6pd
Q2) What are some things a parent shouldn’t say to a gifted child?
Q3) How can parents best provide a nurturing environment for their gifted child?
A2 They need to understand they will fail but failing forward is a great growth experience.
A3 By allowing them to explore their gifts in their own way - while not ignoring the needs of school, etc.
A3 By valuing the whole child and not making love conditional on anything
A3 talk to their child and listen to them. Gt's must know someone is in their corner.
A3) Provide books, games, opportunities based on a child's interests.
A3) Nurturing doesn’t need to be expensive; it needs to be a priority in parenting.
A3 The same nurturance as with any other child - not making giftedness necessary in any way for receiving parent's love
And let them struggle with something. https://t.co/sGTQ5p8Eae
A2 They need to understand they will fail but failing forward is a great growth experience.
A3 Find reasons to say yes; find opportunities to ask, 'What do you think?'
A3 Understand their sensitivities, differences, quirks - challenge them when necessary, give them a break when they need it
A3) follow their lead, get them out of doors, read to them a LOT. Play games with them, build with them, explore with them.
We’re already half way through our chat! Thanks for all the great sharing!
A3 Surround w diverse resources, opportunities, but don't force feed. Focus on *meaningful* things for which resources can be used
don't underestimate social/emotional &lead w strengths/interests.If in "typical"school-advocate &allow home to be respite
Of the 100s of gifted children I’ve worked with, the most well-adjusted viewed themselves a kid first, gifted second.
A3 Help them find their niche where they can connect with like-minded peers - SOOO critical
A3 Advocate and shield them from adults who criticize, shame them, and don't understand their differences
Q4) What’s the best way to approach a child’s teacher about giftedness?
A2) (after A- or B+ or...) Why didn't you get an A?
That's good to hear. What did those kids' parents have in common?
A4) In my experience, teachers appreciated being given resources they could explore on their own.
without defensiveness and understanding that most teachers have had little training about high achieving vs truly gifted
A3 Let their child explore a lot of their interests Allow them to fail and change their interests until the… https://t.co/aL0yKo4DOu
Q3) How can parents best provide a nurturing environment for their gifted child?
A4) Often times gifted learners become visible only when there's tension between teachers and parents. It hurts.
A4 With respect, tact, and a collaborative spirit - open mind about working together to solve the problem
A3 e.g. books, literature, tech, sci tools, art supplies, etc. Then involvement in community projects of authentic interest to kid.
A4)..delicately. Praise what the teacher's already doing, acknowledge many diff abilities in class. Offer answers not just questions
The problem I see is: gifted kids often slow down in adulthood.
A4) Better to talk about a child's academic needs and not use the gifted word.
A4 Work with the teacher to design the best learning plan A great teacher will see their strengths and help… https://t.co/8OM8YOmGcW
A3) limit screen time, based on age. New Acad. Pediatric recommendations excellent starting point.
A4: Assume T has same goals as parent and be a partner; offer support in time, resources, ideas.
A4 Work with teacher to brainstorm cost-effective solutions - your child isn't the only one in the class
a4) yes, ! No "G" word and NO "B" word (bored)!
A4 I appreciate it when a parents lets me get to know their child before they sit down to tell me about them.
A4) Parent- teacher relations always benefit from a strong parent group/network; know before you go.
I admit this is a sore subject with me. I tried everything and nothing work. Teachers/principals were quite uncooperative.
A4) With hope and a student first mindset, there will be points along the journey where neither party agrees!
We encountered many problems too! And I worked for the school district!
A4 First define Gifted vs giftedness. Discuss domains of exciteabilities/intensities, special needs, expectations, etc.
Us too, Carol. Terrible experience with child #2, but great with child #1. State early retirement program between
I can relate to this also
See? It still upsets me so much I make typos! And my kid's 27! I should be over it right?
A4) offer to provide book resources for teachers, her/his own copies if s/he'd like.
a4) be certain NOT to get a teacher with a bright or moderately gifted child if you have a PG child. Kid you not.
Q5) What advice would you give a parent of a recently identified gifted child?
We have so many kids come to us at CMASAS for this reason. Feeling for you on this as a parent & as a professional
No...it is still an injustice
A5) consider your child's actual academic needs, not the "g" word.
I've reflected on that. In a tweet, I'd say discussion-centred granola-style emotional intelligence.
A4. Your child’s T is a caring professional. Suggested approach: Trust, humility, and questions in the spirit of collaboration.
Interesting. Wonder why that is. We're surrounded by exceptionally/profoundly GT in our circles, all going strong.
A5) “When we confuse eminence with giftedness, we ignore the fact that the true essence of giftedness is …” https://t.co/28KkhBZXkR
A5. Having significant autonomy/choice in one’s learning/programming might not be crucial for your gifted child. But it could be!
Carol my kid's 21 & definitely not over it. District never paid the settlement the hearing officer ordered, either.
i'd advise parents to look online for opportunities for kids and not totally depend on busy teachers
1.educate yourself about unique social/emotional issues 2.Find your tribe 3.Be patient w/less informed family 4.advocate
A5: Share resources, but nothing changes as result of identification. They still know their child's strengths/areas for growth
Good suggestion! https://t.co/JFAXEWsdqK
i'd advise parents to look online for opportunities for kids and not totally depend on busy teachers
A5 Get educated, read, learn about giftedness, find a parents advocacy group, get support. Buckle up!
That's terrible, Carolyn!!
Trust your instincts you will always do what is best for them. Encourage, embrace, and have patience they a… https://t.co/CDzUGALzdt
Yeah, it seems like the 'g' word and the 't' words = third rail. I say 'academically advanced', gets me further
A5) Become intimate with your child's areas of giftedness & give yourself permission to grow w/your child as they seek to understand
Lucky you! We ended up w/ severely damaged 2e kid in lock-down ward post-abusive IEP mtg -no academics only neg support
A5 Help them see value in whole child, connect w/ , & learn about intensities, neurodiversity, etc.
There's so much out there to feed a child's curiosity! https://t.co/y2tT9UOfaM
i'd advise parents to look online for opportunities for kids and not totally depend on busy teachers
A5) Regardless of the situation, parents should insist on having everything in writing. Most states require this.
A5) Invest in aspirin and soft pads for desks walls, and tables (for banging their heads in frustration).
A5 Allow yourself to enjoy the good stuff without shame (find friends with whom you can share your child's successes)
A5)If the diagnostic report offers strengths & weaknesses that you don't agree with see results as possibilities & challenges as ops
A5) if you land in a district that refuses writing, refuses to record meetings, lies... MOVE. We were trapped, unable to move again.
A5 Understand and work through your own mixed feelings, confusion, wishes and expectations so they're not projected onto child
There are good online parent groups that are supportive. https://t.co/86UVFj9oMg
A5 Allow yourself to enjoy the good stuff without shame (find friends with whom you can share your child's successes)
A5 Find a group of like minded parents and share and learn from them too.
A5) Learn your child's strengths & weaknesses as well as his/her learning style. Be prepared to advocated- based on that, not g wrd.
A5) If parents aren’t familiar with definitions/defining ‘gifted’; take time to learn all they can.
sounds like i'm conflating and - education the earlier the better:)
A5) Gifted kids can stress you out; remember you’re the adult.
*Empathy* I'm still in Complex-PTSD therapy myself. Started my career w "at-risk"gifted. Ended up homeschooling mine
A5) do your homework. Learn your state mandate and read your district policies. Do NOT ask at the building but find online /main off
A5 Take a deep breath, be patient and know it can be a rough road but it leads to an amazing journey. Strengthen your debate skills
Q6) What parenting resources would you recommend to parents of gifted children?
This is also why I ended up throwing up my hands & starting my own school, "detoxing" so many kids from this crap :(
Well said. In the end, you need to work well with your child's T. Bring your expertise of your child to the table.
GTChat, Gifted Parenting Support. ;)
A6) The first resource that changed the course of my kids’ life was our state gifted organization.
I fear I'm not alone. I hear the same story month in / month out as director of Hoagies' Gifted, in PA and more
A6. “Shared Solutions” is an exemplary ON document for avoiding/resolving conflicts re programs/services. https://t.co/TY3F8YmtXH
A6 Hoagies of course! Also, NAGC, SENG Davidsons, tip.Duke, state organizations
anything from Gifted Homeschoolers Forum and Bright Not Broken book for
anything from Gifted Homeschoolers Forum and Bright Not Broken for
I agree with everyone Hoagies is the best source.
A6) A strong, active parent group is critical to your child’s success; join one or start one!
https://t.co/DmahhJ5HN2
Don't panic. Yes, they have incredible potential! Read "A Nation Deceived/Empowered" and understand asynchronous development.
A6 If your child has a specialized talent, may need to seek out specific info (e.g., tech, music, art, chess, languages, etc.)
A6) National organizations like have great conferences and or websites.
A6 If child has a 2e issue, need to find online sources associated with this for support (e.g., LD, ADHD, etc)
We’re nearing the end of today … final thoughts/takeaways?
A6 Also books/articles on Neurodiversity, and several TED talks.
Connecting is top priority. https://t.co/vJYJfYdtn9
A6) National organizations like have great conferences and or websites.
Thank you for an insightful chat.
Such a important topic!! Thank you, Lisa, for hosting this!
This will be archived at & the link will be shared via later today
Thanks, Lisa for another great chat!
Thank you for moderating a great chat.
Yet another great chat, Lisa!
A2) "Don't worry about it. You're smart & don't need to study."
Thanks to the extraordinary staff for their awesome support; we couldn’t do it without them!
YES to this. I love SENG for their work in this, plus some of the neurodiversity discussion has helped.
Thanks to the Advisory Board:
See you in Florida, Lisa?
Be sure to follow some of the new friends you met here today at to continue the convo
Thank you, Lisa and everyone for an enjoyable discussion. :)
Sorry. Maybe next year, or SENG Chicago?
Please note time changes for in two weeks. There will be no chat next week due to the U.S. Election.
A3) Parents must educate themselves on the nature and needs of gifted children
Already have a room booked! Tweetup in my suite!
Our next chat will be on Tues Nov 15th at 8E/7C/6M/5P (US)/Wed 9th Nov at 14.00 NZDT/12.00 AEDT/1.00 (UK)
